Letting In - Closing Out, published by academics at the University of Auckland, found cultural expectations of marriage and children are pushing ethnic youth in New Zealand to remain silent about their sexual orientation.

Parents struggle with understanding their children's queerness, with many choosing to ignore or deny it, some because of their religious belief or reputation, the report found.

Pooja Subrananian, 28, moved to New Zealand from India with her family in 2004. She is bisexual, and opened up about her sexuality to her parents six years ago.

"My own sexuality acceptance journey has been very recent, and up until that point it has been really emotionally difficult," the Howick, Auckland resident said.

"You feel a sense of isolation, like you don't belong in either world, and you've got to choose which world you're going to perform for that day."

Subrananian said there are a number of factors that make it difficult for ethnic queer youth to open up to their families.

"In a lot of our communities we're told that's not our culture. There's also a sense of obligation or respect for our family, we want them to feel supported by us," she said.

"So we remain silent out of that sense of respect."

North Shore resident Eugene Velasco, 27, is non-binary and came out to their family in 2017.

"They weren't happy, they were disgruntled and weren't really welcoming about the idea of me not being straight," they said.

Velasco is yet to see their family, who live in the Philippines, since sharing the news with them.

They said they didn't come out until they moved to New Zealand because of their family dynamics. Continue reading

Where to get help for the LGBTQI+ community

• OUTline NZ 0800 688 5463 (0800 OUTLINE)
• RainbowYOUTH 09 376 4155
• 1737, Need to talk? Free call or text 1737 to talk to a trained counsellor
• Depression.org.nz 0800 111 757 or text 4202
• Lifeline 0800 543 354
• Suicide Crisis Helpline 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
• Kidsline 0800 54 37 54 for people up to 18 years old. Open 24/7.
• Youthline 0800 376 633, free text 234, email talk@youthline.co.nz, or find online chat and other support options here.

The Abortion Law Reform Association of New Zealand set up a "give a little" web page to raise $300 to send the flowers, support messages and "sweet treats" to three abortion clinics.

"We want to balance out the vitriol and stigma perpetrated by the anti-choice '40 Days' campaign," ALRANZ stated on its "give a little" page.

The campaign raised $425 from 28 donors.

The amount above $300 is being spent on supporting other abortion clinics and providers, starting from Invercargill and moving north.

The 40 Days for Life campaign runs from February 10 to March 20, and is taking place outside AMAC in Auckland, Wellington Hospital and Christchurch Hospital.

Those participating in the vigils are praying for an end to abortion, for women who are considering an abortion -that they may chose life, for women who have had an abortion and who are now seeking spiritual and physical healing.

Prayer is being offered for those doctors and nurses involved in abortion industry that they might change and promote a culture of life.

But ALRANZ said the clinics involved are being targeted for harassment.

Right to Life spokesman Ken Orr rejected this charge.

"It is disappointing that ALRANZ, a small pro-abortion anti-feminist organisation, is opposed to prayers for an end to the killing of the unborn and for support for women to choose life for their unborn baby," Mr Orr said.

"This organisation is conducting a campaign of 40 days harassment of those praying in these vigils. There has been verbal abuse, theft of signs and prayer material.

"Those participating in the vigils will not be deterred by this harassment," Mr Orr said.

ALRANZ said it would be organising "some counter-protests".

Sources

• Give a Little
• Right to Life New Zealand
• Image: A Culture of Life