Did I die? Let me count the ways

By now most of you must have heard the leaked tape where Donald Trump explains to Billy Bush that he often kisses women without permission and grabs them by their genitals as they both die with laughter at how funny that is.

I was pretty upset about that tape, but not because I am a prude or even that I am shocked that men talk like that.

When Billy Bush says “will you give him a hug” while holding back giggles, I remembered all the times that I was the girl who was the butt of jokes between boys and men.

I was upset that a man running for president would talk like this, but come on, it’s Trump, I wasn’t shocked.

He’s been on Howard Stern talking about all kinds of sexual escapades, I heard them way before he was ever a household name because he is gonna make America so great again.

I heard the tape on the way to confession on Friday.

It was my wedding anniversary and my husband wanted to start our celebration with a clean slate by going to confession together. As we drove there I saw the story breaking and listened to the video.

I was flabbergasted and so was my husband.

I was so sure that this was it, Catholics would all see what they had been supporting this entire time and it would be over for Trump.

I had all faith that Catholic men would not stand for this kind of complete disregard for the dignity of women.

We went to confession, ran one last errand and then went to our favorite dive bar to have a few drinks before leaving town.

I have an issue with drinking when the memories of my trauma come up.

I can’t do anything when that happens but sit at home look at a picture of Jesus on the cross and pray for the flashbacks to go away while my dog lays next to me to keep me safe.

I have done this a million times and if I even sense for a second that I am in anyway reliving what happened to me, I do not drink.

I didn’t think that what Trump said would bring up any of it for me because I am Catholic now.

I have an army of Catholic men who are ready to protect me and other women.

My brothers in Christ will keep me from ever being the victim of another man’s objectification. Maybe not all of them, but the ones that I know are pro-life do. Or so I thought. Continue reading

  • Leticia Ochoa Adams is a writer, blogger, student, mother of 4, step-mom of 3 and grandmother of 2.
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